Jesus Who?

This Christmas season, apart from trying to avoid some really awful renditions of carols that play in supermarkets (seriously, "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" is bad enough already without you screechily murdering it like that), I have been thinking a little bit about who Jesus really was. Being brought up in a Christian family, you don't tend to question this much, but I was thinking that while historically it is pretty certain that there was a guy in the first century A.D. whose name gets rendered in Greek as Jesus, and whose followers called him "Christ", it's hard to know what he was really like. (As an aside, no serious students of history actually question that Jesus existed – quite a range of different sources attest to that – the questions are around whether or not he did everything that was recorded by his followers, and about his deity – or not).

He was obviously influential, as he inspired followers who were willing to go to their death rather than deny him, and he started the largest religion in the world (yes, Christianity is the largest; Islam is second – so, incidentally, over half of the world is monotheistic). Jesus is the person who separates Christianity from its parent religion, Judaism. Jesus lived in an area that to this day still does not see peace, and is, and has been for many centuries, a hotspot for religious fervour and pilgrimage. The amount of history in that area fascinates me.

Some have mentioned how Christmas is actually us celebrating a middle eastern refugee family, which puts quite a different spin on it. He was Jewish, he was middle-eastern. Whether or not his family was poor is hard to tell, but either way, their standard of living to us would have seemed very poor, although the fact that Jesus had a trade suggests he didn't do too badly for the time. I also find that you get a very different picture than the Renaissance-era paintings and stained-glass windows when you think of Jesus as a builder. He worked with his hands, and would have spent a lot of time outdoors. He associated with fishermen. These are all very blue-collar, working-class sort of people – usually fairly rough and uncouth, too. Quite different to the pious-faced, long-haired, pale white guy we are used to. I've never seen a builder who looked like that. (As an aside, I am deliberately reinterpreting the term we usually use – carpenter – because it's easy to miss its actual meaning; also, apparently the word is more closely rendered as "artisan", and may in fact have meant he was a stonemason, as this fits a bit better with the architecture of the time).

I think people tend to conceive of Jesus (and God too, which is another discussion) as a reflection of themselves – we see Jesus as a theologian, as that's how theologians have perceived him. We see Jesus as religious and "holier than thou", because that's how religious people portray him. But, through all the shrouds of history's fog, I wonder who the real person was, and what he was like. Somehow, considering that he befriending the unwanted, the poor, and the workers, and strongly offended the uptight religious types, I don't think these perceptions are anywhere near correct. Somewhere all that way back in history was an actual person. He got tired, he got hungry, he cried, he laughed, he had friends, people got upset at him. Who was the *real* Jesus?

Jesus certainly didn't seem "religious" – the only enemies he made were hypocritical religious leaders. He hung out with the screwed up, the broken, and the outcasts. "Bad", messy people loved him, respectable, "good" people were the ones who hated him. Please, Christians, remember this more!

Was Jesus God? Did Jesus do miracles? Was he who he (and his followers) said he was? These questions, while crucial to his identity, are much harder to answer, as they strike deep into the heart of one's understanding of the universe – to accept these is to accept a reality that includes the supernatural; there is no other way about it. Either Jesus was a miracle worker or he wasn't. At this point, it's easy to quote Occam's Razor and say that it takes a bigger assumption to accept the supernatural than to accept an alternative explanation (e.g. the writings we have about him are wrong, his followers were liars, etc). Also, the bigger the claim, the bigger the evidence required – and the story of Jesus certainly makes some big claims. But, to have people willing to follow you the way Jesus' disciples did (to their deaths, in all cases but one), doesn't sound like what people would do if they knew they were lying, and there are a lot of archaeological and other historical recordings that corroborate the records in the Bible. It still requires a pretty giant leap of faith to accept, but taking the on-the-face-of-it Occam's Razor version (Jesus wasn't supernatural) still leaves a lot of unanswered questions, and a lot that doesn't add up – in some ways, accepting the supernatural gives a simpler, more consistent answer.

I was thinking recently that the one place I would want to visit if I had a time machine would be to go find Jesus. The real Jesus, the actual person, to see first-hand who he was and whether or not he was able to do the things said about him in the Bible – or, conversely, to find out that actually I've been wrong all my life. Either way, it would be good to know. Either way, I think I would learn a lot. Who was this person who left such a mark on history – and why was he so important?

One thing I do know: Jesus was a significant person. Even if you don't accept his deity, we can all learn a lot from what he said. The wisdom and the care for hurting people in his recorded words and actions is undeniable. Whether or not he was God, I still want to be more like the person I read about in the Bible – care, love, wisdom, compassion, forgiveness, an ability to inspire people to better themselves without feeling condemned, a disdain for the fake and hypocritical, and a willingness towards personal sacrifice for the benefit of others. I would like to have a friend like that. I want to be more like that myself.

Think beyond just whether or not you believe in Jesus. Either way, there is a lot we can learn from that man, and I am fascinated about this enigmatic yet noteworthy individual.

What It's Like Living With a Chronic Illness

First, an apology. Some of you are good friends of mine who will probably want to know why I haven't told you about this before posting it so publicly. To you, I'm sorry, but hopefully as you read, you might get to see some of what has gone on for me.

And many of you will be surprised, as I probably haven't "seemed" sick. In fact, most days I looked normal.

I didn't even look sick enough for the doctors to take much notice... at first. My typical experience has been that a new doctor interviews me, doesn't think there is much to it, is kind of dismissive, then sees my blood tests and realises that, no, I'm actually not making this up.

So, what is wrong?

I'll start by allaying some concerns you might have: no, this isn't terminal. No, it's not going to kill me.

A little over a year ago, I started getting stomach cramps. It's hazy now, but I think it started after I had a one-off tummy bug. I have never been someone who had huge energy reserves or a lot of stamina, but it seemed to get worse: I was in a funk I couldn't get out of, and tired all the time.

Eventually, I finally listened to my wife and went to the doctor. This is where the "well, I can't see anything wrong" bit comes in, but to his credit, my doctor was someone who listened properly, and even got a stool sample done at my request. (Apologies to those who don't enjoy this sort of thing, but yeah, I'm going to have to talk about poop. Welcome to my life). This was the first breakthrough, as it showed increased markers for inflammatory bowel disease.

Many of you probably haven't heard of Inflammatory Bowel Disease (or "IBD"), but it's not the same thing as the more commonly-mentioned Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS). It's actually less fun. IBD has two types: Crohns Disease and Ulcerative Colitis. If you care about the details, feel free to google the terms, but pretty much it ranges from tummy pain and discomfort right up to ulcers, blood in your stools, lethargy, fevers, diarrhoea, vomiting, having to have parts of your colon removed... I could have it much worse.

So, fast forward through a year of suckiness and sickness, and I'm down to working only four days a week, because I get so exhausted (did I mention ongoing anaemia?) and simply couldn't handle more than that. Even then, most days I'd be struggling to get through eight hours, or making mistakes, or forgetting things, or all three. And, making as many as six visits to the toilet in a day to poop, often urgently, and often uncomfortably.

And, the emotional drain has been so bad that my doctor has me on antidepressants. Yes, antidepressants, as in those things that you give to people with mental problems. Want a phrase that makes you feel really special about yourself? Try, "I have a mental illness." While our culture has become accepting of a lot of things (well, on the surface and in name at least), mental illness is still one of those things that we unconsciously (or even consciously) consider anathema. I've always been a friendly person and have tended to be emotionally stable – I'd even go so far to say that I was pretty unflappable in most situations, and almost never let my temper get the better of me. But this disease? My wife described me as a "different person", because I would snap at anything, yell at the kids, fail to control my emotions. Not fun.

I have friends who have had to deal with far worse mental disorders than mild depression, and now I have a lot more compassion for them. It's not a fun thing having to come to terms with the idea that "There is something wrong with me." Even physical disorders are something that you can "externalise" – i.e. convince yourself that it's a problem with "my body" rather than "me" – but you don't get such a luxury when the problem is mental. And, as I have learned, you really cannot just "talk yourself out of it", you can't "get over it". While I had grown up a bit from my younger days when I thought mental issues were just that – in your head – I now learned first-hand that the reality is that our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health are all interlinked and inter-dependant. There are times when you need to treat a mental disease with a physical cure – in my case, this was especially literal, because my emotional state was primarily a result of my physical condition. (There are a number of studies coming out now confirming that mental health is intimately linked with gut health – your gut is so important to your overall well-being that it can send "I am not ok" signals that affect everything else).

It was hard for me to admit that I needed antidepressants. There was a time when I would have said that was all wrong, and if I'm honest, if it wasn't such a direct physical cause, I might not have been so accepting. But the reality of being so sick made it an obvious choice, and in fact it was one of the best decisions we made, as after a few weeks, I finally felt like myself again. I could function emotionally again, and emotional lethargy and anger didn't control me so much.

Finally – after two colonoscopies (no, they're not pleasant), innumerable blood tests, an MRI, and almost every other test I could think of – I had the specialists at the hospital confirm that it's Crohns disease and that they are going to give me drugs to treat it. Specifically, immunosuppressants and steroids – so I get to have a weakened immune system. And apparently I'll have to stay on those drugs indefinitely. As in, for the rest of life.

But, after the year I've had, that actually feels like a win. It will be a whole lot better than what I have been living with.

And yet, I didn't "look" sick. Most days I was able to act normally. Except for when I ended up in such a bad state that the doctor admitted me to hospital for three days.

One of the things you learn with something like this is the surprising number of people you know who also have "silent" illnesses, or who suffered through things you didn't know anything about. I feel acutely aware of human frailty at the moment – my own and others'.

Did I want to tell the world about this? No, not really. It's not fun to experience, and it's not fun to talk about. Especially the need to be on antidepressants – none of us want to admit that we're somehow broken.

But, you know what? Everyone is broken somehow. It's called being human. Everyone has issues you don't know about. Maybe you disagree with them somehow, but perhaps what you don't know is how and why they got where they are. Maybe if you knew that, you might be a little more understanding.

So if someone says, "I'm sick" (for whatever reason), don't respond with an "Oh," and then stop talking to them. If someone has issues, and is gutsy enough to share them with you – or worse, circumstances force them to talk about something when they don't want to – then please be understanding. Respond with kindness, and don't say that "It will be all right one day", because maybe it won't. Maybe, like me, they have a disease for which there isn't a cure. I am hoping that one day someone finds a real solution and a real cure for Crohns – and I have done enough reading to know that there are people trying – but in the meantime, I have to live with the fact that I'm going to be taking medicines for the rest of my life. So no, it probably isn't going to be "all right". I am fine with it, and simply, this is my reality now, as it is for probably a lot more people than you realise. Secret struggles are hard, so please never respond with anything but compassion.

Admitting brokenness takes courage. We need to applaud it, especially in a day where image is everything, and everyone has a fake social media persona. Most people only show the good bits. I have massive, massive respect for the person who is willing to drop the masks and say, "You know what, I'm actually not ok." You would be surprised at what people have to deal with behind the external image of someone who has it all together. I've known enough people to know that shit happens to everyone. Usually really horrible shit.

So, this is me. I'm living with a chronic illness, even though you probably wouldn't see it. It sucks, but maybe it is making me a better person (if a more tired one), so, like everything in life, it's not all negative but is a mixture of both the bad and the good. If nothing else, I've learned that I don't have the solutions to every problem.

I hope this will help someone.

I'm Not Racist, But...

"I'm not racist, but..."

I heard this phrase recently (from someone I didn't really expect it from), and unsurprisingly, it was followed by a racist comment. Not Trump-esque inflammatory, not especially bigoted or horrible, but racist nonetheless. The worst part was that it had been preceded by that comment. Had the same thing been said with an admission that the speaker was uncomfortable with this fact about themselves, I would have been a lot more ok with what they said, but for some reason the denial made it worse.

I have two kids, and like most kids, they give responses like, "I'm not arguing with you!" or screaming "I'm not tantruming!" when they very much are. On one level it's amusing, but even at their young age, the lack of taking ownership of one's faults irks me. More than anything, it is because that has been one of my own biggest failings: it took a kind comment from a former boss about how I am always wanting to blame-shift when he approaches me with a problem before I learned to take responsibility for my own failings and mistakes. (Thankfully, at the time I was smart enough to keep my mouth shut, even though my very first thought was, "No, I don't do that!" The irony was not lost on me).

I have sympathy for people who don't take full ownership of their faults though, because I know it's really hard. That comment from my boss was about ten years ago now, and I'm still working on putting it into practice. I get it: we don't want to be wrong. In the narrative of our lives, most of us cannot bear to see ourselves as the villain - instead we would rather see ourselves doing everything for good reasons, that everything we do and say is justified.

The reality though? You are just as selfish as me. You are just as likely to be the villain in someone else's story as the morally-upright hero in your own.

I think if we are really honest with ourselves, we all know that we are anything but morally upright though, don't we?

Hmm, it's quiet in here.

So, are you racist? No, of course you aren't. We've all met someone like the old lady I talked to when I visited America years ago, who was so disappointed in my friend because he was marrying - shock, horror - a Hispanic girl. It was "so below him" to marry someone from "an inferior race".

I'll be honest, that was the closest I have ever got to wanting to inflict physical harm on an old lady. Again, thankfully at the time I kept my mouth shut, but that was only because I couldn't think of anything whatsoever kind to say in response.

We see charlatans like Donald Trump, or some of the (honestly sickening) things being said to immigrants in the UK after the Brexit vote, and it's easy to say "Wow, that's horrible - I'm glad I'm not racist like them." It's easy to compare ourselves to the worst and be self-congratulatory for not being that bad.

And, I would actually expect that, like the person who spoke the opening comment above, we honestly don't think of ourself as racist.

I have some sad news for you.

You are racist.

So am I.

I could easily point out how I love travelling and meeting new people, how I love learning from different cultures, how two of my very closest friends are Chinese, how I have other friends and acquaintances from all walks of life, backgrounds, and religions (off the top of my head, I can name Indian, Maori, Mexican, Polynesian, Iraqi, Japanese, Korean, German, people from several parts of Africa, Christian, Atheist, Muslim, Buddhist, bisexual, homosexual...) To show how I think, I could use the example of a story I am writing at the moment, with a part-Maori female engineer as the main character, and other characters who include an Arab woman, an intelligent African guy, a Japanese-American millionaire, French, Indian, someone who doesn't identify with binary genders, and a disabled guy. I actively go out of my way to root out racist tendencies in my own life. I hate hearing about racial discrimination.

But you know what? I am still racist.

I, like I expect most of you, honestly thought I wasn't, until I spent time in East Africa. One of my friends there (Australian by birth, if you really want to mess with stereotypes of who is racist) had grown up as a "missionary kid" and she simply did not see racial differences. It was weird to meet someone like that, and disconcerting to realise that at a subconscious level, I saw lots of differences between cultures and races (some nothing more than baseless perceptions). I am very glad though, because it made me see that I have a long way to go.

So perhaps dialogue on race can start with a couple of concessions from us all:

• I am racist. Say it out loud: I. Am. Racist. Say it again: I am racist. I am a bigot, whether I like it or not (hopefully, not). Feeling uncomfortable? Good. You should, as I guarantee you have said something in your life that made someone else feel uncomfortable.
• There isn't really such a thing as race anyway. (If you don't get what I'm talking about, go look it up, but in simple terms: everyone is a bit of a mongrel, and the idea of singular racial streams is an illusion - at a genetic level, there are more differences among groups of white people than between a white person and a black person. We're all human).

If you read or follow dialogues among people of racial minorities in places like here in New Zealand, you may come across the term "Micro-aggressions". Now, at first you might (like me) think, "Surely that's just trying to make a big deal of out nothing? It's not that bad, get over it - this is 21st-century New Zealand, not the 1930s in America's Deep South!"

But, then if you read more of what they are talking about (a Kiwi-Chinese guy I know from University writes very eloquently on the subject), you begin to see that, when you are the target, there genuinely are a lot of subtle racial slurs or "micro-aggressions" directed towards them. Sometimes, people do that deliberately, sometimes the aggressor doesn't even realise - and yes, some are genuine misinterpretations, but a lot less than us who are the privileged white elite would expect.

I am fortunate that I was born into a good family in a prosperous, peaceful, country, with myriad opportunities. I am, if I'm honest, a privileged white guy. By nothing that I could control or influence, I get to be considered "top of the pile" in pretty much every area, because of my sex and shade of melanin^[1]. I'm not rich (boy do I know that) by Western standards and neither is my family, but on virtually every metric of quality of life (income, safety, healthcare, education, etc), I come in at or close to the top 1% in the world. When I learned that, it disturbed me, in a way best summed up by a quote I saw this week:

What are you going to do with your privilege?

I don't know, in many ways. I am working long-term on finding ways to make my life worthwhile to those worse off than me, or who suffer more from racial discrimination, but I could do more now. We all could. But you know what? Letting that get to you will only bring despair. Don't let the size of the world's problems make you feel like you can do nothing.

You witness micro (or not-so-micro) aggressions and do nothing about them. You see idiots spouting rage and garbage (especially on the Internet) and shake your head.

But, you know people. You can be the one who reaches out to that foreign stranger and welcomes them. You can show an interest in people different to yourself. You can, instead of complaining how the Chinese are buying all the houses and ruining "our housing market", go and make some Chinese friends and learn to understand their culture. Go to an authentic foreign restaurant (or even a nearby takeaways) and try to learn how to thank them in their own language (although check they don't sound like a local first!) Engage with people who disagree with you (and do it with respect). Be the person who stands up for the awkward kid who can't speak much English and gets picked on because of it.

Show the world - your world, your little sphere of influence - that racism is not ok. Make it clear (starting with yourself) that being awful to someone you disagree with pretty much makes you an a... a jerk.

Question yourself. There is a story that says at the Museum of Tolerance (set up by Jewish Rabbis in America), there are two doors, one labelled "Prejudiced" and the other "Not Prejudiced". Most people, on arriving, stop thoughtfully for a moment here, then try the "Not Prejudiced" door, only to find it locked, forcing them to take the "Prejudiced" door. We are all prejudiced, and - I think - the more we are self-aware of this, the more likely we are to treat others better.

I do get it though: you become used to what you grew up with, and change is disconcerting. For a lot of the UK, they grew up in white-faced, comfortable townships, and now they find themselves surrounded by strangers with languages they cannot understand and incomprehensible cultures. The world around them has changed, and it makes them uncomfortable. I am supremely thankful that I grew up with a Maori kid next door and a recently-arrived Chinese family over the back fence - multi-racial environments (and new immigrants) are natural for me now, but I know that isn't the case for a lot of people. It is going to be hard, especially for those of you who are a little bit older and not used to this strange new world we live in (for you younger ones, yes, the world now is very strange compared with all of prior history). Building community with strangers takes work, but it is absolutely worth it.

Another quote I saw this week (post-Brexit) on the subject of racism was this, "I don't see the problem with the [Brexit] result being that half the country is racist, but that now the racists think half the country agrees with them." Don't let the horrible people in the world believe that others agree with them, please. I know someone in the UK who voted Leave, but definitely not for racial reasons (politics is always more complex than the media would have you believe, but that's another, very long, topic...) We need to make it clear that we, no matter who we are, do not agree with people being blatantly racist.

If you want a better-written version of this message, then go read Andrew Chen's post about Brexit. He says it better than I can, but I think it is a message worth repeating.

And, thank you. I hope that this is helpful to someone. This is me trying to influence my tiny part of the world. If enough of us do this, we might even change the big world, too.

Oh, and if you are in America - or know any Americans - please show Donald Trump that racist rhetoric will not get you elected! I know the American election this time around is the choice between "very bad" and "even worse", but we cannot let Trump's sort of attitude be acceptable for a leader.

The Quest for the Perfect Keyboard: Part 3, the Conclusion

See also: Part 1 and Part 2.

Did I find the perfect keyboard? After all my research, what did I get?

Well, I learned that the perfect keyboard doesn't exist. And, if it did, you would have to make it yourself. And it would cost hundreds and hundreds of dollars - if not over a thousand. Does that mean my quest was a failure? Not necessarily - I discovered that there are a lot of keyboards far, far better than what I was using, so while I cannot get the "perfect" keyboard, I can get a really good one.

I also learned that to get close to what I would call perfect is well out of my price range at the moment. One day, I might be able to justify spending around $500 on something like the TECK, but not today.

The process was helpful though: I had to analyse what mattered to me, what I could do without, and what features and attributes were "showstoppers" for me.

If you noted, when I started this I commented that I don't have any budget at all to spend on keyboards, but thankfully there's a thing called Christmas, and the fact that there wasn't much else that I wanted for Christmas. And, a half-price special on one of the products I had my eye on made a big, big difference.

So, I got this:

The Tesoro Tizona.

Yes, I went all purple Spanish flaming sword. Raah.

Is this the perfect keyboard? Nope. But it's MUCH better than the playdough-like, garbage, cheap membrane thing I was using.

Bleck.

The keys have taken me a moment to get used to - I realised that the distorted layout on the keyboard I was using at work has me expecting keys in the wrong places (mainly the arrow keys). But, I'm getting used to it pretty quickly, and I get a removable numeric keypad, which attaches to either side of the keyboard with nice strong magnets. The hold between the numpad and the main keyboard is good and solid.

As you can see above, I put my numeric keypad on the left. Because I can. At first, this was quite a lot more awkward than I expected: I'm not used to using the numpad with my left hand. It sort of feels backwards. Also, it's amazing how much you miss having an enter key in the very bottom right of the keyboard (this was my wife's first complaint when she started using my computer - until I pointed out that she can simply move the keypad to the other side again!) Having choice is good. It definitely is nice having the mouse where I want it.

I went with the "Brown" keyswitches, which means "quiet tactile". I figured I would probably annoy people if I got the clicky ones, even though they apparently provide a better typing experience. The other interesting thing about mechanical switches is that they activate half-way down, not when you bottom them out: this means that, with care and practice, I can type gently and not bottom out the keys - making it notably quieter (even the Brown keys are louder than any membrane keyboard I have ever used). I might, if I get that way inspired, get some rubber dampener rings to quiet the bottoming-out clack, but that's for later.

But, once used to it, is it better to type on than a membrane keyboard? Oh yes. So much yes. It's cleaner and more responsive - I know when I have pressed a key, and the key works every time. No guessing, no wondering if that keypress registered. And, because it's registering the keys at the mid-point of the key depressing, I don't even have to push it all the way down.

Seriously, if you haven't tried a mechanical keyboard, you really should. It's noisier, but so much nicer.

For the purists, the Tesoro uses "Kailh" branded switches; a company called Cherry produced the original mechanical key switches, but with their patent expiring, copycats have been able to replicate their design. Kailh switches are arguably inferior to Cherry (or at least, so say some strong opinions on the Reddit Mechanical Keyboards forum). However, others argue that there isn't much difference. For me, this is my first mechanical keyboard, so I'm happy. I doubt there is going to be any quality issues, as this is quite a sturdy keyboard (for those who don't know, mechanical keyboards usually come with a honking great metal backplate in them, so are a lot heavier than other keyboards. You could probably use it as a blunt-force weapon).

The Tizona has three "thumb keys" - little buttons below the space bar, intended for use as shortcut keys. I haven't yet got around to configuring these, but the place where I see they will get the most use will be at work, where I'm doing a lot of CAD, so have my right hand almost always on the mouse - my plan is to turn the thumb keys from being "web browser", "my computer", and "email client" into Backspace, Delete, and Enter, as these are the right-hand keys that I find I most often want from my left hand. However, I'm not decided on that, as I already assigned the Back and Forward buttons on my mouse to Backspace and Enter, so that's two functions I already have on hand... But, it's my keyboard and I can set it up how I want (Autohotkey being my helper), and I like that I've got extra options that I don't know what to do with yet!

And, while it is completely irrelevant to the usability of the keyboard, the Tizona really does have the best box I've seen. It's awesome. It even comes with a plastic cover that works really well as a dust cover (for the main keyboard at least - no such luck with the numpad).

And no, that's not your eyes fooling you: the box really does have tapered sides. It's a trapezium, and so is the smaller, matching box for the separate numeric keypad. Why? I don't know, but it's cool.

So, in the end I got a keyboard that fulfilled most of the things that I found mattered most to me: it's mechanical, it lets me put the numeric keypad wherever I want, it has three extra buttons for me to configure, and even has a couple of bonus features like media keys (with use of the function key). I even got to keep the Menu key.

Another small bonus is that because the numeric keypad can attach to either side, it leaves a spare USB port on the other side (or a free port on both sides if you have the keypad completely separate) - built-in USB hub!

Now the only problem I think I am going to have is that when I'm using something else, all your normal keyboards are going to feel awful!

I do have a suggestion to you though: if you are using an awful keyboard, don't. Many of us have jobs that involve spending a lot of time using these things, so get one that you like. And if you get sore wrists, then definitely find something that looks after them. Most workplaces will probably look at you strange if you say you want something better than the stock $15 keyboard that came with a computer, but ask anyway - or, just do what an old co-worker of mine did (around the time that I started looking into all of this) and go out and buy your own to use. It doesn't have to be a $500 mechanical ergonomic masterpiece, but even among membrane keyboards, a quality one is far, far better to use than a bad one. And look at ways to make using the keyboard easier - modify the layout, learn how to use Autohotkey and make the Scroll Lock key work for you, add shortcuts and macros. Don't settle for rubbish interfaces.

The Quest for the Perfect Keyboard, Part 2: Specific Models

See also: Part 1 and Part 3.

And so our intrepid hero sets out on his quest to find the perfect keyboard. Will he find it, or will he be defeated by the trolls of Budget Valley?

I think that I should start this second entry with an insight I made while researching all these options. Call this the "mid-story let-down":

There is no such thing as the perfect keyboard.

The reality is that there are so many different factors that go into making a keyboard great that you will never please everyone. In fact, you will probably never please one person entirely (well, not a picky, always-want-to-improve-everything type such as myself at least!)

One suggestion was to build your own keyboard, as then you can do with it what you like (this was where I stole the "There is no such thing as the perfect keyboard" line). I did start to look into this, but you have to be very serious about your keyboards to start that... and be well-funded (think ~NZD$500 or more), and be good with a soldering iron, and not be afraid of compiling and flashing custom firmware, and know where to casually source "custom laser-cut steel mounting plates". Needless to say, as attractive as it would be having a keyboard that is truly configured to exactly what I want, I did not continue pursuing that idea for long.

Alas, I am not worthy to conquer Hardcore Custom Build Mountain. (Well, not yet - maybe later when I've got a 3D printer and space and budget for mad projects...)

And so, this low-level hero is going to consider cost as one of the factors. Because, let's be honest, even though a keyboard is used a lot, there is a certain point where "good enough" gets overtaken by "I could spend this money on something else".

To paraphrase another comment I heard a long time ago: the perfect keyboard would be one that has a single button, labelled "Do what I want". Ultimately, the perfect keyboard wouldn't even be a keyboard at all, but would be something far more efficient, like a direct brain-computer interface. But, in the mean time, we have to settle for the best ideas that someone has managed to bring to market - some good, some actually pretty great, some "good idea, but missed", some distinctly... not great.

To the list. I'm going to roughly order this from what I thought was best but most expensive down to the cheapest and nastiest. When those two metrics don't conflict. Sort of. You'll work it out.

This is far from an exhaustive list - the more I looked, the more I found new keyboards, but after a while I found I was seeing less and less of the innovative types and seeing only standard ones. Even from those I have seen, I have tried to keep my list down to the more interesting or relevant ones (those that scored well when compared against my list of criteria from the first post).

Truly Ergonomic Keyboard

Want.

Starting at the "awesome but expensive" end of the spectrum, there is the Truly Ergonomic Keyboard. When rating keyboards by the criteria in my previous post, this one came out with the highest score. It's fully programmable, has an excellent layout (central keys accessible by either hand for example), onboard memory, a choice of mechanical key switches, and a removable wrist rest. I like where they have put (and how they have laid out) the page up/page down and home/end keys. It's also nice and narrow, so allows bringing the mouse closer to the keyboard. Not having a dedicated numeric keypad is a bit of a negative, but because the keys are in a columnar layout it would be better than most "numpad on the main keys" layouts.

The name is a bit pretentious, although it is one of the most (but not quite the most) ergonomic layouts I have seen. Also, seeing as the name is such a mouthful and not easily shortened, it gets called the "TECK" (Truly Ergonomic Computer Keyboard).

The big negative though? Price. It retails for about USD$250, with an eye-watering USD$69 shipping to New Zealand - to put this in context, some of the cheaper keyboards come in at less than that shipping cost for the entire package! This means you'd be paying nearly NZD$500, which is pretty brutal for a keyboard. So, as much as I like this one... no.

Available: from the manufacturer. Not many other places, it seems - which is perhaps sad, as I think this is one of the few genuinely innovative keyboards.

Keyboardio Model 01

Pretty... So pretty.

This scores super-high for ergonomics, second only to the Kinesis (next). It is easily the most artistic of all the keyboards I looked at too - one of the few times I would look at a piece of computer hardware and call it "beautiful". The designers have really gone all-out on this one: full-colour backlighting, custom-shaped key caps (!), real wood. But more than that, it takes the ErgoDox split layout and refines it to give a unique layout. It's fully programmable - in fact, they talk about it being "open-source hardware", and apparently it even ships with its own screwdriver! These are people who are serious about their art, and serious about letting people do with it what they want.

Again, if I had the money, I would love one of these.

For me though, it scored a little below the TECK because it does away with a few too many buttons. At my count, it only has 64 keys total (a "standard" keyboard has 104, and a tenkeyless usually has 87). While the missing keys would be easily accessed by using a modifier key (nicely placed in reach of the thumbs - and on this keyboard, even the edge of the palm), I'm still not a fan. The further a keyboard goes from a standard layout, the longer it will take to adjust, and I still hold that every time I am using a modifier key, it slows me down more than if I'm going straight to a single key - it's kind of a "double seek" in terms of finger movements. Of course, the layout being so easily within reach of your fingers may very well offset that, but I am wary of losing keys.

You can probably guess it's big disadvantage. This is not a device that holds back on design or quality in any way. It is genuinely beautiful - they describe it as "heirloom grade", and I would agree - but that does come at a price: USD$330, or nearly $100 more than even the TECK. For us Kiwis, that means half a grand.

So, pretty as it is, I'm going to have to give this one a miss as well.

Availability: only from their website. And, not until the middle of 2016 (so there is a remote chance that this still turns out to be vapourware and never delivers - I doubt that, but even if not, you are still waiting months for something that costs a lot of money).

Kinesis Advantage

I know, it looks really weird.

Ergonomics are important to you? Then you are probably going to be hard-pressed to beat the Kinesis.

Well, except that everyone always tries to go one better - pictured is the Safetype, the only keyboard I have ever come across with wing mirrors.

Let me rephrase that: the Kinesis Advantage is probably the most ergonomic layout you are going to find that doesn't involve wing mirrors. I have to say that when I was having a small rant in my last post about there not being enough innovation happening with keyboards, wing mirrors was not what I was thinking.

Anyway, back to the Kinesis - sorry for the detour, hope I haven't confused you. This keyboard has a lot going for it beyond the ergonomics: macros, unlimited key remapping, 2-port USB hub (even if said hub is only USB 1.1, which is kind of lame). It is very wide, perhaps unnecessarily so, and the function keys - while thankfully present, unlike say the Keyboardio - are a bit of a let-down (and not mechanical keys, while the rest of the keyboard is mechanical). Having keys in a "well", curved to match finger length, is great, although I think that the layout of the TECK would be more useful (e.g. Enter and Backspace in the centre, able to be reached by either hand). If you have wrist pain and a decent budget, this keyboard should be a serious consideration.

Oh, it also comes in black. Batman would be pleased (come on, surely he's done some damage to his wrists with all that punching...)

Ok, so my ordering "roughly by price" has failed so far, as the first three have been in increasing order of price - yes, this out-prices even the Keyboardio. I actually found a NZ stockist, but $512 plus shipping hurts (though at least in this case, the shipping was under $20). The manufacturer had it at USD$299 (or USD$325 for the version with both QWERTY and Dvorak layouts printed on the keys!), but I couldn't find their shipping costs (don't expect it to be cheap, although there is always NZ Post's Youshop, which is pretty reasonable).

Availability: for some reason, this seems to be the keyboard that no one wants to price publically, and while it's available in a few places, it seems to be a sort of "special order" type device. Kinesis sell it themselves. DTSL is a NZ-local supplier.

Ergodox (Ergodox EZ)

Pictured: the Ergodox EZ

This is the real "open source hardware" keyboard. The basic ErgoDox layout was designed by one guy, who goes by the moniker "Dox", hence "Ergo" + "Dox" (an ergonomic keyboard designed by Dox) = "ErgoDox" (who'd have thought it?), but the design sits well and truly in the public domain - originally, you had to be enough of a keyboard nut to self-build if you wanted an ErgoDox: download the plans, and cut, solder, and assemble yourself. Now however, you can get all of that customisable goodness pre-assembled, as the ErgoDox EZ ("EZ" = "ee zee" = "easy", geddit?) This is an ergonomic keyboard that is extremely configurable, and the default layout even lets you control the mouse using the keyboard. It's a pretty cool toy.

Cost here is USD$270 (including shipping), or around NZD$400. Still not cheap.

Availability: from the Indegogo page. Alternatively, you can dive into the world of the ErgoDox (non-EZ) and buy parts, either assembled (when available) or not. For that, be prepared to join in the keyboard community and to wait for the next group buy - yes, beyond the EZ, this is definitely a keyboard for real hardware enthusiasts.

Roccat Ryos TKL Pro Tenkeyless / MK Pro

Roccat Ryos MK Pro

And now we get to the genuine gamer keyboards - the ones where appearance matters just as much as build quality. I think the designers of this keyboard were going for a stealth bomber aesthetic, but it definitely looks cool. The Ryos comes in two types: the full-size "MK" (pictured) and the tenkeyless "TKL" (the same thing but without a numeric keypad). You get full control over the blue back lighting, and media controls via function key alternatives, but the real stand-out feature of these two keyboards is their ability to do macros. The Caps Lock key is replaced with an "Easy Shift" key - basically, you have an easily-accessible key that changes the function of pretty much any (or every) key on the keyboard, then stores it in the onboard memory (the keyboard apparently is run by not one but two ARM processors - overkill did I hear you say?) Per-app profiles, fancy dedicated software, usage statistics (in case you want to know which keys you use the most)... These are pretty serious keyboards.

You get to choose the type of mechanical key switch, so quiet or clicky, tactile or linear are all options.

Price-wise, they're not cheap, but not bank-breaking either (the two models sit either side of the NZD$200 mark).

Availability: a few places stock these - thankfully, it's a bit more mainstream, so you have options. Mightyape usually have stock.

Roccat Arvo

Roccat Arvo

This is one of the few non-mechanical keyboards I looked at, but it's because of a unique and, I think, innovative idea on saving space: there's a special key that switches the numeric keypad between its normal function and that of the arrow and Home/End cluster, removing those latter keys from the keyboard. This makes it almost as small as a tenkeyless keyboard, but still gives you the option of having the full numpad. Without sitting down and giving it a good test, I cannot comment on how well this works in practice, but I imagine there would be a bit of adjustment needed. At least it lights the keys to show you what mode its in. However, I love that Roccat is trying something new. The Arvo also comes with three programmable macro keys by your thumbs, which I think is a really good place to put extra keys (you'll notice that this shows up on a number of the keyboards here).

In terms of price, the Arvo has the advantage of being a cheaper membrane keyboard, so I saw it at NZD$100, or on special for $75. It is worth noting though that this misses the responsiveness and quality of mechanical key switches.

Availability: again, a few options, but Mightyape is an easy one.

Levetron Mech 5

Azio Levetron Mech 5 - keyboard pretentiousness at its best.

If you like your hardware to be visually impressive, this is the keyboard for you. It's industrial-meets-military-meets-I'm-going-to-put-extra-buttons-everywhere. While some keyboards try to save on desk space, this one looks like it begs you to build a special desk just to contain it. But, under the extreme overkill of its appearance, this really is an awesome 'board. It has macro keys everywhere - and by everywhere, I mean you can re-position that fold-down 6-key block. But, even better, if you decide this monster leaves your mouse too far away, you can attach the numeric keypad on the left side instead! (As you may have noticed, a removable numpad is a feature I think should be standard). Even I don't know what all the buttons on this thing do, but I do like that it has a good, solid wheel for the volume control - a decent volume knob is something I miss in this digital age.

It's a pity I don't think I have a desk worthy of it. It would make all my other peripherals look wussy.

It's so feature-laden that in my scoring, this was only beaten by the TECK. It pretty much does everything. It's a pity though that one of the things I was thinking of doing with a new keyboard was transporting it to and from work - this does not look like the most portable unit out there...

Price isn't bad, at around NZD$185.

Availability: here's the kicker. Most likely, you'll be looking at getting it in from offshore, but stock for this keyboard seems hard to come by even there. My suggestion would be to try Amazon and get it shipped to a NZ Post Youshop address.

Razer Blackwidow [Tournament] Stealth

Razer Blackwidow: pictured, the Tournament Stealth

The Razer Blackwidow keyboards seem to be well-known, which is not something that can be said of many mechanical keyboards at all. Consequently, they have both their fans and their haters. What I find is that there are a dizzying array of different versions: you have the Stealth, the Ultimate, the Chroma, the Tournament, the 2014 version, the 2016 version, and nearly every combination thereof (so yes, the "Razer Blackwidow Tournament Edition Chroma Stealth" is actually a thing). Oh, and they do game-branded versions as well. This page (I think) lists them all. There are a lot.

Anyway, beyond all the different types, for the most part they are relatively standard mechanical keyboards. "Tournament" here means tenkeyless (no numpad), "Stealth" means quiet tactile keys not loud clicky ones, and "Chroma" obviously means it has fancy-coloured backlighting. I haven't bothered looking up what "Ultimate" means. For my purposes, the Stealth and Tournament Stealth were the only ones of interest. These offer limited macro recording (I say limited because it requires specialised Razer software for it to work, and apparently an active internet connection, which is silly) and alt-function-key media buttons.

But, the pricing isn't bad. The tenkeyless Tournament version retails in NZ for around $100, with the full-size version being roughly another $40.

Availability: these are popular 'boards, so they shouldn't be hard to find. This was about the only mechanical keyboard I saw out on display in a retail store, allowing me to have a play with how the mechanical switches feel (thank you PB Tech Hamilton). Have a look at local retailers for prices, as it will most likely come down to whoever has a special on at the time.

Tesoro Tizona Brown TKL Tournament

Tesoro Tizona Brown TKL Tournament TS-G2N with detachable G2N-P numeric keypad [breath]. Why do gaming keyboards have such verbose names!?

Tesoro have this neat (if pretentious) idea of naming their keyboards after famous mythical swords - things like Excalibur. The Tizona is apparently a "burning blade" wielded by an old Spanish hero who I had never heard of. You have to see the box art though:

Best box ever. No, this isn't overdoing it at all.

Purple is kind of a theme here (it even has purple LEDs, which is not something you see every day). So, usual pompous gaming keyboard hype, three macro thumb keys (not configurable sadly, though that's why we have Autohotkey), alternate functions on some keys via a function key (media playback controls, "gaming mode", etc). Interestingly, it has the ability to switch between n-key rollover (NKRO) and standard USB 6-key rollover if the custom NKRO ever doesn't work (which I think is a nice touch to have - make sure it works everywhere). But, the stand-out feature - and, let's be honest, the only reason you would buy this over other offerings - is the removable numpad. Sadly, said numpad is a separate purchase, which pushes the price up a bit. You get to either have a tenkeyless keyboard, a "leftie" keyboard, or a standard layout (literally the only thing differing from a standard layout is replacing the left Windows key with its Function key).

Price-wise, it's... ok. Once you factor in the numeric keypad and the shipping, it's up over $150, which for an otherwise fairly basic keyboard means you are going to have to really want that removable keypad.

Availability: the best option I found was Mech KB in Australia (mainly because shipping from Australia isn't nearly as nasty as shipping from America). At the time of writing, they have it on a half-price special, which suddenly makes this an attractive option, although at time of writing, they are also out of stock.

(By the way, the "Brown" is the key switch type - quiet tactile - if you're wondering why a keyboard with "Brown" in the title is actually black and purple... it also comes in three other key switch types).

Logitech G910 Orion Spark RGB

Ooh, pretty colours. And buttons - so many buttons!

In what is perhaps the epitome of gaming keyboard excess, we have Logitech's Orion Spark. It has nine macro buttons, it has dedicated media keys, if has a volume roller! It has weird custom-shaped keys, apparently designed to help you identify keys better (I actually think that's a good idea - though I'm not sure about the shapes they have actually used). It goes somewhat overboard on the backlighting, and has a monstrous wrist rest. But more than this, it has a dock for your phone, for when you want even more things to look at.

Yeah, it's pretty cool, even if its overkill.

If you're a gamer and what a keyboard that does, well, everything then this is probably a good choice. For me personally, there's a lot of functionality there which I would simply never use.

Price was around $240 when I looked at it, so not cheap - although you are getting a lot of keyboard for that. The official website has it at NZD$350. It pays to shop around. Thankfully Logitech are a big enough brand that you'll be able to find it in a bunch of places.

Availabilty: direct from Logitech (if you don't care about money), although Pricespy lists a number of NZ stockists.

DSI Left-handed Mechanical Switch

No, that image hasn't been flipped - it's a keyboard for lefties.

While not left-handed myself, I have heard the annoying and sometimes weird places where objects designed for right-handed people fail to accomodate lefties. But why am I listing a left-handers keyboard here? The answer is that, as I mentioned in my previous post, putting the numeric keypad on the right was an idea we had before the mouse was introduced. Now the numeric keypad gets in the way of having the mouse where you would like it, and so I started looking at keyboards that put the keypad on the left instead.

There are surprisingly few of these.

Either left-handers simply don't know you can get a keyboard like that, they (like the rest of us) have got used to a sub-optimal keyboard layout, or there is a serious untapped market. I found a total of about three models of left-handed keyboards, and this was the only mechanical one.

I think that modular keyboards give better flexibility, although I would happily use a keyboard with the lefty layout there (some leave the arrow and navigation keys on the right).

Availability: good luck with that. You either need to get it from an overseas supplier (and work out shipping to NZ) - Mechanicalkeyboards.com was one option - or find a local stockist. I found a local stockist, but their price on this keyboard almost made me gag (it started with a "4"...) I don't know what it's so hard to get this keyboard. Offshore price was about NZD$135, but shipping is probably extra.

Microsoft Sculpt Ergonomic Desktop

Microsoft's keyboard got nicknamed the "Manta Ray".

Another keyboard that makes my list despite not being mechanical, this one gets a mention because it's simply so unique. This is, I think, a case of Microsoft getting it right - what I have read about the ergonomics of this keyboard is all positive. It makes the numeric keypad a completely separate unit, which is a brilliant idea (you can put it wherever you like - left, right, above the mouse, completely out of the way).

And, it looks cool. (Cool is not something that Microsoft often get right - usually their attempts at "cool" fail so miserably as to be utterly tragic).

However, it's not perfect. In making the keyboard more compact, they have removed almost all the gaps between keys, which gives you almost no way of knowing where you are without looking down. Beyond the main block, almost none of the keys are in standard positions - it is going to take you a while to adjust to this. Sadly, as much as I like what they have tried to do here, I wouldn't buy this keyboard, because I would be constantly mis-hitting keys - and then going back to any normal keyboard would be a similar nightmare. And, you have to rely on batteries, which I'm not a fan of.

Unsurprisingly, this keyboard is pricey for a membrane keyboard - but with good reason. I found it at around NZD$140, which actually makes it more expensive than some of the low-end mechanical keyboards. However, it does come with a mouse (but I'm not certain that's entirely a good thing).

Availability: lots of places, so I'll point you at Pricespy.

Other Keyboards

I am realising that this is getting to be a fairly long list, and I have covered most of the models that are unique enough to warrant full descriptions, so here's a list of one-liners for "the best of the rest".

• Kogan Backlit Mechanical [Tenkeyless]: two different size variants on the same standard mechanical keyboard with monochrome backlight - nothing particularly special, but at around $115 (with free shipping to NZ!), it's not going to break the bank.
• Matias Optimizer: a neat idea on adding keyboard shortcuts, replacing the Caps Lock key with an "Optimize" button. While new shortcuts for cut, copy, and paste probably aren't going to speed you up much, things like Delete Word (left or right) sound cool. They apparently used to do a mechanical version, but now you're stuck with the membrane one, which seems sad. Roughly NZD$75.
• Logitech G310 Atlas Dawn: tenkeyless gaming keyboard that is basically a smaller and simpler version of the G910 Orion Spark mentioned above.
• Thermaltake Tt eSports Poseidon: a backlit take on the standard keyboard layout. Apparently only comes with Cherry MX Blue switches (i.e. loud and clicky).
• Rosewill Striker RK-6000: fairly standard mechanical keyboard with programmable keys. Apparently it comes with a key cap puller and grippy versions of the gaming keys. Sits around the NZD$100 mark.
• Filco Majestouch Tenkeyless: a fairly expensive version of a standard keyboard, it does come highly regarded - basically, this is the posh version of something ordinary. I'm guessing you're paying for quality, seeing as it's almost twice the cost of other alternatives?
• Lolita Spyder TKL: a not-bad-looking take on a backlit, minimalist tenkeyless, and usually available from Aliexpress.com (prices and links may vary) for around NZD$100 with free shipping. I'm guessing though that whoever named this doesn't know their Russian authors (especially coupling it with a predatory invertibrate). Then again, the company making it is called "Noppoo", so perhaps English isn't their strong point.
• Cooler Master CM Storm range: there are quite a few keyboards in the range here, but there was one thing common to all of them that really bothered me - they do away with the "menu" button. While for many that would not be a bother, for me it was one of those things that would keep annoying me. Also, I couldn't find any for under NZD$150.
• Safetype ergonomic keyboard: this keyboard is easily summed up simply by saying "Wing mirrors"! Actually, that doesn't sum it up - you should go and look at the pictures. This is taking ergonomics to its extreme. Also, it's expensive.
• Keymouse: who cares about getting a tenkeyless or whatever to reduce the travel distance between the mouse and keyboard - let's make that travel disance zero. As its name so helpfully suggests, this is quite literally a mouse with a full keyboard on it - well, two mouses actually, not that I know how that would be useful. I think I would like to try this one day, simply to find out if its awkwardness or awesomeness potential wins out.

Concluding Thoughts

One thing I noticed is that the NZD$100 mark fairly clearly separates mechanical from membrane keyboards. Very few mechanical keyboards come in much under $100, but you get a lot of choice in the (inferior) membrane ones up to that price. Some of the higher-end membrane keyboards, such as the Microsoft Scuplt, do go well above $100, but at that point you are paying for functionality and design - and, the reality is that some of the better membrane keyboards are quite good to type on (Microsoft is one of the better manufacturers here, from what I have come across). I guess this delineates how serious a typist you are: is a keyboard worth more than $100 to you? Do you type enough to justify spending more, or are you happy with a rubbishy $20 one? Personally, as someone whose job and interests revolve around using the keyboard all the time, even one of the expensive keyboards would pay itself off in the long term - the 1920 hours a year typically spent at work mean that improving productivity by just a couple of percent would pay for even the most brutally-priced devices here in a year. I think this is something that most of us miss, and why I think its worth the time to learn (or create) shortcuts: for something really frequent, its worth stopping to make it faster.

Of course, there is a point where trying to make something more efficient ends up wasting more time, but the brilliant Randall Monroe of XKCD has provided a convenient chart for working out if something is worth the time. From that chart, I would say that for most of us improving typing speed is easily worth a week - and that's for only a five-year return, when I expect (barring some dramatic technological leap forward), we are all going to be spending more than five years of our life typing most days.

This is why hunt-and-peck typists kind of annoy me if they are in a job where they type often (although the slightly-less-terrible "two-finger hunt-and-peck" seems more common): you spend most of the day at the computer, and a good proportion of that typing, so why haven't you learned to do it efficiently? You'll do your neck a favour not needing to look down all the time, and touch-typing is so much faster.

Of course, the typist type (ha!) who annoys me the most is one I came across who I would title the "two-finger hammer typist": it's like the hunt-and-peck, except for some reason they feel the need to hit every key really hard (so you can feel it through the desk when sitting next to them). One of the big selling points of a clicky or tactile mechanical keyboard is the fact that you do not need to "bottom out" the keys to use them - i.e. you can truly become a "touch" typist. One of the negative things said about clicky mechanical keyboards is the noise, and having worked alongside a hammer typist, I can understand why this would get annoying - although in that case, I don't think a clicky keyboard would actually have been any louder, because all the noise was coming from bottoming out the keys so hard.

I'm an engineer by trade, so for those who might have been suspecting it, yes I did score the keyboards quantitatively. If you would like to see my spreadsheet with all the numbers, then you can download it here (slight warning that it's an ODS file not XLS, but that's because I prefer LibreOffice to Excel).

So, finally on to the concluding third part: did I find my perfect keyboard?

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I have tried to keep to using images in the public domain or my own images where possible, or to link to the manufacturer's site for the source, but this has not always been possible, so if you see an image of yours that you do not want me using, then please let me know and I will take it down.

The Quest for the Perfect Keyboard, Part 1

See also: Part 2 and Part 3.

I know this is probably a strange place to start my blog, and is going to paint me as a even more than total nerd than my post about science fiction, but at least it shouldn't be a controversial topic (I'm not afraid of a good argument, which can sometimes not go down so well...)

(For y'all international readers, I'm in New Zealand, so some of this will be localised information).

So, at the moment, the computer keyboards I'm using most often are all awful. At work (where I'm spending the most time in front of a keyboard), there's an HP Z1 all-in-one workstation (which is actually a really nice machine - something I don't often say about HPs), but it's keyboard leaves a bit to be desired. It has all the keys on it thankfully (not like Toshiba laptops - I actually use the Pause/Break key sometimes and don't like having to go hunting for the Windows key), but they've tried to make it take up less desk space (a worthwhile cause with the amount of paper that typically occupies the desk), and in doing so have rearranged the Home/End cluster and mashed the arrow keys in close to the main keyboard. It's not very different to a standard layout, but it's just different enough that I keep hitting the wrong thing or having to look down to find the right key. It also seems to have a reduced key travel, which makes a surprising difference to the feel when using it.

Those changes don't look like much, until you try and touch type.

Then on my machine at home, I'm using the "random spare keyboard that we inherited from somewhere once", which is a Genius USB keyboard. This is the same company that makes mouses¹ for under $10. You can probably see where this is going.

That looks ok, right? (Apart from being dusty and a terrible photograph).

All the keys are in the right place now (well, apart from the backslash, but that's not too bad - if you looked carefully at the HP one above, you might have noticed that despite trying to make the keyboard smaller, that one actually had two backslash keys, one of them making the left shift key so small you can't tell it from a normal key by feel...) With this Genius keyboard, you see it and think, "This looks good", then you attempt to type your first key and go, "Ugh!" It's like trying to type on playdough. Playdough that doesn't respond properly when you hit it (thus making you want to actually hit it).

(If you're wondering, the other two keyboards I use - both of which were used for typing parts of this article - are an old Microsoft PS2 keyboard with media keys, which does a pretty decent job, and a Swipe keyboard on my smartphone - which is easily the best way to type on a touchscreen, even though typing on a touchscreen is a generally painful experience for a touch-typer like myself).

So, this frustration led me to start looking at getting a better keyboard. Not that I have any budget for one at the moment, but it was a way to vent my annoyance.

And maybe I kind of got obsessed. Enjoy my quest.

Beware that this quest is not for the faint-hearted time-constrained. I am going to go in-depth on a lot of points and into probably way too much detail. I'm a power user, and my needs and wants are probably way more specific than most people will ever care about. (It's not like other skim-the-surface supposed "power user's" guide).

What Makes a Keyboard "Perfect"?

Unless you have ever looked into the world of gaming keyboards, or are a total nerd like myself, you probably have no idea of the features and number of different types of keyboards out there. I'm going to write this for people who don't know what the Dvorak layout is. If you do, feel free to skim-read most of this section.

One of the first things you do learn reading the arcane world of keyboard nerds is that mechanical keyboards are far superior to the typical rubber-membrane ones. If the feel and responsiveness of a keyboard don't interest you, then I warn you that you may be reading the wrong blog post. However, if you do care, PB Tech (at least at their store in Hamilton) had a Cherry MX mechanical switch test unit out, so you could try how the different types of mechanical keys feel. They also had a Razer mechanical keyboard hooked up to a working machine you could play on. Suffice to say that after actually trying a mechanical keyboard, albeit briefly, I can see why the obsession among keyboard nerds. Cheap rubber membrane keyboards are nasty.

I'll try and keep away from going too deep into the keyboard switches, as this has been covered elsewhere better than I can do (such as the Lifehacker article I linked to in the previous paragraph). So what else makes - in my opinion anyway - a keyboard great?

I tried to make myself a little less subjective by rating different items that relate to the keyboard actually being useful. Two things became obvious straight away: layout and numeric keypad placement. As you may already have noticed, moving keys around from where I expect them to be is anathema to me - especially when it has not had any sensible reason. Part of being a touch-typist is that you know instinctively where the keys are located, and so even slight changes can lead to typos and frustration (alas poor backslash, for ye have no fixed home). Actually, I think the backslash key seems like this bothersome afterthought that no one seems to know where it should be put, but one that can't be removed because we all use Windows and some of us even still type file paths. So, I like a keyboard where everything is where it should be (and, to go one further, easily reachable when needed, which leads to...)

Why is the numeric keyboard on the right-hand side, in exactly the location where you would like to have your mouse? (Short answer: history. The keyboard layout was designed before the mouse was introduced. If you re-thought a keyboard with the mouse in mind, I imagine it would look quite different). If you're right-handed and not using a mouse, then the arrow keys and numeric keypad placement make sense. If you're left-handed (I'm not, if you're wondering) or use the mouse a lot (no one does that, pfft), then it's really dumb. Before starting my quest, I knew that a removable numpad was a good idea. You also get what's called a "tenkeyless" layout, which is a normal keyboard without the numpad - and, you can add a separate numpad to this if you like, placing it wherever on the desk you choose.

Microsoft, you have the right idea. Pity that you've ruined the arrow and home/end group layouts (no gaps to give tactile guidance on where to find these keys - ergo, I'm going to be having to look at my hands all the time).

Of course, you could always set up so that you really never need to take your hands off the mouse in order to reach the keyboard:

Behold, the Keymouse.  I imagine this being somewhere between "revolutionary" and "extremely cumbersome".

Other things that I came up with:

Ergonomics

While the only issues I seem to have are with my mouse hand² (and minor), carpal tunnel does not sound fun (I once worked with a guy who'd had carpal tunnel surgery - he was basically addicted to painkillers). Ergonomics definitely scores points though - if I'm going to find a keyboard that I use all the time, I want to make sure I can use it comfortably, and that it's not going to cause me problems later.

Configurable Keys or Alternate Key Sets

See below as to why, but being able to type symbols or characters from other languages (Greek at least) makes it much more useful. My ultimate keyboard would have the Greek alphabet, accented Latin characters, and common mathematical and engineering symbols, all accessed by nothing more than specialised shifting key, and printed on the key caps for easy reference. As far as I'm aware, this has never been done.

Ok, so maybe it has been done.  Yes, this keyboard had a "Greek" modifier key (along with Shift, Ctrl, Top, Meta, Super, and Hyper!)  And, it was actually called the Space Cadet keyboard. I don't think this would be usable under a modern operating system though. I still don't understand why I cannot buy a keyboard that does this now though.

If you have ever tried to type a foreign language, you will realise the importance of accented or other non-standard-ASCII characters. If you have ever used someone's computer that has the Microsoft's "US-International" layout, you'll realise that turning standard keys into dead keys is really annoying, especially if you are trying to type something technical. If you have ever tried to type an engineering paper (°, ±, m³, µ, Δ...), you will realise why I care about being able to easily access alternative characters.

I came up with my own solution for getting to the keys I want:

Yes, I customise my keyboard layout.  The only issue I have with this is that I need admin privileges to install it on a computer (so use at work is out). If you want to use this, comment and I'll post a link - or, you can use the Microsoft Keyboard Layout Creator to create your own.

Linux has the Compose key, which actually seems like a really excellent idea, but I found it wasn't consistently implemented (well, adding new composes was far from easy and didn't work everywhere), and there isn't a Windows equivalent that I know of. A GUI compose key-string editor that handled it everywhere would make me happy (especially if there was a Windows port as well!)

Some of the really excellent keyboards have GUI interfaces that let you configure your own layouts then save them to onboard memory in the keyboard itself, so it remembers your customisations when plugged into a new computer. At least one of these was apparently someone reverse-engineering the firmware, a hack that later got officially recognised... (which, take note, is the correct response to someone hacking your product, because everybody wins).

In the process of writing this, I came up with another neat solution that doesn't require administrator privileges: see below.

Macro Recording

This is slightly different to redefining the layout, as macros are pre-recorded strings of characters that happen with one keypress, as opposed to altering which character is assigned to which key - although, a good macro editor should be able to achieve a similar effect as a layout editor. Most keyboards implement macros based on special "macro" buttons though, so you're limited in how many macros you can have. Good keyboards let you assign a macro to any key on the keyboard (preferably with use of a modifier key of some kind, although I am suddenly realising the joys you could have messing with someone else's key layout just slightly!) Nice manufacturers don't require an active internet connection and custom drivers for this to work...

Onboard Memory

I have sort of mentioned this, but it's worth giving it its own title - if I am going to put lots of work into configuring my keyboard, I want to then be able to use that elsewhere. One of the things I am going to want to do is use my keyboard at work as well as home, seeing as I spend more time on the computer at work. I don't want to (as I had to do today!) use a different computer only to find that all my useful shortcuts just aren't there and I have to go the long way around for everything (of course, running Autohotkey as a Portable app and copying the script file made my day a lot easier). ☺

As an aside, Autohotkey is awesome. I have a left-handed backspace key now, and can set the (otherwise mostly useless³) Back and Forward buttons to something better.

Efficiency Boosts

Ok, lame section title, but this is basically a catch-all for extra functions that make the keyboard more useful - and, in my opinion, this is where there is still the most room for innovation.

The Matias Optimiser: replace the Caps Lock key with a specialised key that gives you access to lots of quick shortcuts (the "delete word" ones seem particularly useful). Apparently they even used to do a mechanical-switch version of this. It's also hard to find a good image of this keyboard - check out the Matias site for more info.

It's a bit sad that apart from that one keyboard (ok, and the "Easy-Shift" thing on Roccat's Ryos keyboards), I don't have anything to say about keyboards that make your life easier or do anything significant to improve productivity. Some gaming keyboards do fancy things with macros, but surely we have more ways we can improve our computing experience? Considering how useful I find shortcuts and mappings I construct using Autohotkey, I am certain that more can be done here. As an example: why are Backspace, Delete, and Enter only accessible to the right hand, which spends most of its time holding the mouse? Why on a normal keyboard do our thumbs do so little work and our little fingers so much? Why, when I'm entering numbers, do I have to reach so far across the keyboard to get brackets or an equals sign, the former also requiring Shift? For that matter, why does the question mark need Shift? (Ok, so this paragraph probably has an unusually large number of question marks, but you get the idea!)

I still miss having brackets on the numpad.

Yeah, I miss this keyboard.  Mainly for the brackets on the keypad (why does no one do this now?!?), though a Help key always seemed smarter (and more intuitive) than using F1.  Also, I accidentally hit F1 so often, I'd be glad for it to be somewhere else.  I had forgotten how sparse that keyboard was though.

Columnar Layout

Co-what layout, you say? Have you ever noticed that keyboards have the rows of keys offset from each other a bit? No? Well, look at it and you will notice this now, and you may also notice the numeric keypad has all the rows aligned in a grid. The staggered arrangement has its origins as far back as old typewriters (apparently so the keys wouldn't jam - just like the QWERTY layout). We've kept it because... no one wanted to change. This isn't really necessary, and arguably isn't even helpful.

Behold, the ErgoDox⁴.  Notice the aligned columns of keys.  (In case you are wondering, yes, I will be revisiting this keyboard later for other reasons).

The arrogantly (but perhaps not undeservedly) named Truly Ergonomic Keyboard.  Early spoiler: if budget was no concern, this would probably be my keyboard of choice.  So much goodness (oh, and a columnar layout, which they go on about a lot). And, seeing as I've mentioned it, notice how the Enter, Backspace, Tab, and Delete keys are in the middle, so they can be used by either hand.

Multimedia Keys

You can never have too many keys.

Even I don't know whether I'd use all those buttons.  They go so far as to assign alternative functions to the Function keys (see what I did there?  Ok, never mind). But the insane (typical Microsoft) thing is that they don't put the alternative functions where you would expect them: "Spell" is on F10, when the Spell Check shortcut has always been F7 in MS Office. Also, at least one iteration of Microsoft keyboard made the alternative functions the default. That was so annoying, let's just say that the "F" on the "F Lock" key quickly came to mean something other than "Function"...

Ok, let me rephrase that comment about never having enough keys: it's really useful to have lots of extra functions or characters you can reach without the need of a shifting/function key.

I have only now realised that the keyboard pictured actually has brackets and an equals sign by the numpad! Well done Microsoft! (So, it appears that their hardware interface design team are significantly more competent than their software interface design team).

Our keyboard on the main desktop at home is a slightly less-insane version of the a Microsoft "Media" keyboard, sadly lacking the brackets and equals sign. Of course, I might be able to reassign those couple of useless buttons over by the numpad to brackets...

It's nice to be able to pause/play/skip music from a dedicated button. And really lovely keyboard designers put an actual volume knob and mute button on the keyboard! But, beyond the volume control, I don't know that I score multimedia keys all that highly - I never use "My Computer" (Win + E anyone?) or "Favourites" or "Search", or even "Web" buttons - they're simply not used enough for me to remember to use them, or they have simpler alternatives. Also, the "Sleep" or "Power Off" buttons have caused their share of problems...

Some people like minimalist keyboards. I am not one of those people.

This scares me.  And not because of the skull-shaped Escape key either (I think that's kind of amusing, actually).

The reason I am not one of those people is that I find it takes me around three times as long to type something that requires a key combination than something that has a dedicated button. This is only an estimate of course, but it is definitely slower - that keyboard above would require finger gymnastics to even get numbers. "Finger gymnastics" - the need to stretch across the keyboard in awkward ways - is the other reason why I prefer having something on a dedicated key. To understand what I mean, note the difference in work your hand has to do between pressing CTRL+C and CTRL+Y - the latter isn't comfortable unless you use two hands, which means taking your hand off the mouse (more travel, more time, more work for your hands, so potentially more discomfort). And yet we have a seldom-used key like Caps Lock on the "Home row", right where you fingers naturally rest (the Roccat Ryos keyboards and Truly Ergonomic Keyboard make other use of that space - even the old Amiga keyboard did!)

Yes, I may somewhat obsess on efficiency... (I'll probably do a blog post on that in the future - and it might even be useful!)

Of course, the advantage that a small keyboard like the one pictured above does have is that you barely have to move your hands to get things - everything is within one or two keys' distance of the home row.

Basically, I like a keyboard with more keys - but make them useful. Having a button to launch a Mail application isn't useful when I don't even have a mail application installed but use Gmail instead.

Anyway, in the process of writing this, I came up with a neat solution to finding enough keys and setting up alternate key sets: Autohotkey lets you reconfigure your keyboard to do... anything. It's a bit complex to use, but awesome. However, one of the tricks is knowing what keys you can safely reassign that will not interfere with other keyboard shortcuts (using the Windows key as a shifting/modifier key is a good start, but Microsoft are slowly introducing more uses of it). Today I found a brilliant solution: the least-used key on the keyboard. Any idea what it is? Scroll Lock. And it even has its own indicator light! Set up an "if" statement that reassigns the keys based on whether or not Scroll Lock is on, and you suddenly have an entire new key set to do with as you will. So far, it's the Greek alphabet with a few more maths and other symbols, but the neat thing is that I can port it to a new computer without the need to be an administrator! Start with the script on this forum.

Software

It's all very well having a fancy keyboard with extra macros and special functions, but how easy is it to use all that? A good advanced keyboard has good accompanying software to help you make the most of it. However, a really good keyboard should let you use all of its functions without the need of installing special software. Being that I can probably do all the re-assigning that I want with something like Autohotkey, the software isn't really a big issue (although fancy extras like "heat maps" of your most common keys could be of interest). Where software is useful is in providing a decent graphical interface and making it easier to configure things.

Apparently the Razer keyboards expect you to have a live internet connection in order to set up and use their software. For a keyboard. That's dumb. Some others use web-based configuration tools. That's not quite so dumb, as it lets you save your configuration to the cloud and then re-use it on other computers.

n-Key Roll Over (NKRO)

Another keyboard geek term, which is only relevant to gamers (or maybe a superhero typing?) "Roll over" is the term for the keyboard being able to handle more than one keypress at the same time. I have to admit, I have never noticed a problem with this, so maybe I'm not quite enough of a keyboard geek after all... (Kidding! ☺) Most of us are unlikely to press more than three keys at once (Ctrl+Alt+Del being the most common >2-key "chord"). I don't remember having to use a Ctrl+Shift+Alt+something combination for anything, but I do know that certain pieces of software will (something like Photoshop or a programming environment), but that's still only four, and predictably uses the shifting keys. When gaming, it starts to matter more: holding Ctrl, W, and A to run and strafe while hitting a number key to switch weapons then tapping Space to jump - you get the idea. "Full n-Key Roll Over" is the term for a keyboard that can handle (apparently) every key being pressed at once, and register them correctly. I don't see this being something I would need, so you get lesser variants such as "10-key Roll Over" and "6-key Roll Over".

If you're a hard-core gamer, NKRO is probably an important feature. Unless you're The Flash, you aren't going to need it for typing.

Built-in USB Hub (and Other Connectors)

This shouldn't need any explanation: why reach around behind your computer to plug something in, when you can conveniently plug it in to your keyboard? Sitting a long way from the desk, or mouse has a short cable? Plug that into the keyboard. Some keyboard manufacturers point out how you can use said convenient USB port for a USB headset or even speakers - or to charge your phone.

However, despite how this seems to be a no-brainer of a killer feature, it's seems surprisingly rare. And, getting anything better than USB 2.0 is not something I've seen anywhere. I can understand on a technical level why it's too much work (and extra expense on components), but it's still sad it's not more common.

As for other connectors, you'll get headphone/headset/microphone jacks, which make a bit of sense, but occasionally there'll be something especially odd: like a dock for your phone, so you can use the keyboard with your phone as well as the computer, or use your phone as a "second screen" in certain games. Gimmick, anyone?

No, this keyboard isn't pretentious at all.  (Without trying them, I'm not sure what I think of the odd-shaped keys, but despite my mocking, the Logitech G910 looks like a pretty sweet keyboard).

Back-lighting

Another gaming-keyboard specialty. While I think it would be cool to have my keyboard doing a "breathing" effect in 24-bit RGB full colour glory, it's... unnecessary. Having it light up keys as I press them is cute, but pointless. I can see a few (very few) places where a backlit keyboard is useful (e.g. using a laptop in the dark). Mostly though, I am touch-typing in a well-lit room, so if I have to look at the keyboard, it's because the layout is poor and I can't find the key I want (e.g. someone decided moving the function keys one space sideways was a good idea - such keyboards actually exist, and it's awful).

So, for me, back-lighting is a gimmicky extra. Cool, but not a necessity. I'm interested to hear if anyone finds it a must-have feature, and why.

Other Features

When you think you've compiled a list of all there is to say, you invariably find there is something else. Some keyboards are waterproof (yep, good idea - which I thankfully have never had to test). Some have built-in touchpads. One even has a built-in touchscreen with macro buttons that have their own tiny screens.

I drooled over the idea of the Optimus Maximus Keyboard, which had a colour screen behind every key on the keyboard. At something like USD$1200 though, it was never going to be a realistic option for a purchase. As for configurability though, being able to change what the keys look like is a spectacular idea.

If you know of any other funky, fancy, crazy, or innovative keyboard ideas, I'd be interested to hear them. Except if its the idea of replacing physical, tactile keys with touchscreens, because that's awful. If you don't know why, then you need to learn to touch type.

Wired or Wireless?

I realised that I had completely missed what should be a really obvious differentiator: to cable or not to cable? Is the reliability of a cable or the convenience and tidiness of wireless better?

This is very much up to personal preference, but, due to a few recent experiences, I have a pretty clear opinion for myself:

• We have had two wireless mice die in the last couple of months.
• We inherited a nice, fancy Microsoft ergonomic keyboard and ergonomic mouse - but they're over-sized paperweights because the previous owner lost the USB adapter, and you can't get replacement ones.
• Batteries!

So yeah, my opinion on wireless keyboards is my opinion on wireless anything (note, I used to maintain television broadcast equipment and installed a wireless network across a reasonable-sized tertiary campus and have had two types of wireless internet, so I've worked with wireless tech more than most): it's great for convenience, and useless for speed or reliability. Being that unless I'm on a laptop (which has its own built-in keyboard), my keyboard stays on the same desk all the time, to me, wireless isn't worth the hassle.

If we had a fancy big media centre in a spacious lounge, then I'd want a wireless mouse and keyboard for that. Otherwise, no.

(I know some will complain about how messy lots of cables get, but again, for the most part, a keyboard stays in one place. Wireless on a mouse I can understand, as the cable does tend to affect your use of the device more - although my latest mouse purchase was wired as well).

Wireless keyboards cannot offer USB ports, either.

Aesthetics

How something looks is important. First impressions and all that. However, my thought is that with keyboards (ok, with everything), I would rather have something that looks plain, ugly, or boring but works really well than something that looks awesome but is kind of naff to use. This is why all my metrics here have been around how "useful" a keyboard is. Given the choice between equals, I would go with the better-looking one, but not if it sacrifices function - as, after all, this is something I use all day, every day.

I do appreciate beautiful workmanship though.

Keyboardio.  A genuinely lovely device (but priced accordingly).
It has an "Any" key!

"Other" Qualities

The reality is that you could find a keyboard that looks good on paper and is rubbish in use. The Genius keyboard I mentioned at the top is like that: it's a simple, properly-laid-out basic keyboard. But it's awful for typing or playing games. The key type and quality have a big part to play here, but sometimes the difference between "great" and "meh" is hard to pin down. Sometimes its personal preference, and the reality is that most of what I have written here is my own opinion and quite likely not shared by others. As you can probably tell, I am a "tweaker" - I'm the person who never accepts the defaults on anything. I always want to find a way to improve things or save time (of course, I'm far from the worst).

The desire to tweak, modify, and constantly improve is why I never enjoy using Apple products: they're designed so anyone could use them, and try to stop you doing anything stupid. But, in doing so, they stop you don't lots of stuff that isn't stupid - it's either their way or nothing. And for me, that's not an acceptable option: I understand the computer down to its bare components, and so I want to be able to get in and make things more efficient for myself. Locked boxes are not ok. (As an aside, in the process of writing this, I have come across a few tricks that will see me gathering and editing Autohotkey scripts and other tweaks to basically build an entirely custom keyboard system in software - every character I want, and most of those without taking my hand off the mouse).

I realise not everyone is like that - for most people, it's enough to "Just get by", but considering how much time I spend on computers, I reckon its worth finding the best. Hence why I'm obsessing over finding the perfect keyboard, when most of you will be thinking it's just a keyboard, for crying out loud!

(You are allowed to think I'm weird and to not care). ☺

So...

Thus begins my quest. Now you know what I am looking for (and, more importantly, not looking for). Next up will be getting a bit more specific on what models are out there (and considering that all-consuming factor: budget).

Up next: The Quest for the Perfect Keyboard Part 2: Specific Models

---

Useful Links

Lifehacker on choosing a mechanical keyboard switch type.

Forum on using Autohotkey to use the Scroll Lock key to give you an alternate character set.

"Power User's Guide to Picking the Perfect Keyboard". Except that I would definitely not call it a power-user's guide - for that, try Mechanical Keyboards on Reddit (below). This link is a brief but reasonable introduction.

Reddit's /r/MechanicalKeyboards. You think I'm a hardcore keyboard nerd? I've got nothing on these guys. Between the strong opinions and photos of custom builds, you can find a bunch of excellent guides and information on everything you need to know about mechanical keyboards.

References

Because every quality article has a good list of citations! Mine has citations too.

• 1. I still do not know whether the correct plural for a computer mouse is "mice" (like the animal) or "mouses" (so it is not like the animal). In one discussion (which I sadly cannot find), it apparently eventually ended on the conclusion that the only correct pluralisation was "meeces".
• 2. Yeah, don't get my started on mouses either. Except that I did find and purchase an ergonomic mouse for USD$4 (delivered) on Aliexpress.com! Link for: Wired and Wireless (USD$7). Those links probably won't work after a while, but searching the site should find updated equivalents.
• 3. Some smart person figured out that no one wants to go dragging the mouse all the way over the screen in order to just get the back button. Little piggy number 1 put a button on a media keyboard. Little piggy number 2 put the buttons on the mouse. Little piggy number 3 learned how to use mouse gestures (Opera browser, we salute your wondrous innovation) - I use a Firefox extension called All-in-one Gestures. It's so good. Actually, on the subject of third-party user interface enhancements, until I make a whole post on it, check out: 7+ Taskbar Tweaker (because middle-clicking an app on the taskbar should CLOSE it, Microsoft!), Tab Mix Plus (yes, I know these are all Firefox extensions, but the reason I like Firefox is because it's the most extensible browser - I can make it do what I want), Social Fixer (take that, Facebook lameness!), and of course Adblock Plus (if you're not using this, your computer is anathema to me - and will probably get it promptly installed so I can actually use the Internet...!) Oh, and Autohotkey, if you're really keen on boosting productivity.
• 4. Sorry for the Google link, but as you'll see, there isn't a central place that this design resides. You can try the (spartan and don't-give-the-user-a-clue-where-to-go) Ergodox.org site, the (buy the parts in a group so you can build it yourself - yes, seriously) Massdrop site, or the (pre-built, "let's make it easy") Indegogo site. This is not a keyboard for the faint hearted.

I have tried to keep to using images in the public domain or my own images where possible, or to link to the manufacturer's site for the source, but this has not always been possible, so if you see an image of yours that you do not want me using, then please let me know and I will take it down.